Week 22

Hey pumpkin!
So this morning saw me hunched up on the floor of Bristol coach station freezing my tits off and feeling hungry, and while I definitely felt sorry for myself, and was close to tears by the end of the four hour wait for the fucking bus, I did feel like I'd just passed a test. A test of resilience. And because the trip had been full on, and there'd been glitches it felt all the more worthwhile, like I'd actually achieved something and deserved to spend the rest of the day eating Crunchy Nut out of the box.
The thing is, I think we're all too much in the habit of passing things by because of petty inconveniences, ad it's so stupid because while it might seem chilled and comfortable to stay at home and mossy around, you end up with absolutely nothing to show for your day. We're defined by our actions, and if life is just made up of a series of different actions surely it makes sense to do as much as you can, so that your existence is an endless series of colourful snapshots rather than a tableau of a computer next to a bed.
I don't know, I guess it just seems like a shame to let time slip by when you could be playing the tuba in a strangers house or flicking spaghetti at the kitchen tiles.




So fair to say that this doesn't deserve to be labelled as a craft project, but alice bands are great, and sticking a velvet bow to one so that you feel like Minnie Mouse does merit a slight nod of approval. Ok, very slight, but at least we used glue.

This week we love...

Interview with a zombie. Note: this article is not for the faint hearted or the prude at heart.



This weekend saw thousands of zombies crawl across Bristol, squishing their faces against bus windows and harassing the elderly, and being serious reporters, this seemed like an event that simply could not be missed. While we're sorry to say that the madness of it all made it impossible for a one to one interview with any specific zombie, I do feel that a certain living-dead needs special mention as his charm and eloquence embodies everything of what it means to be a zombie today. Elly Watson reports.
So after their march across the city the hordes of zombies gathered in a soggy park for a well earned splif and a piss up. Spirits were high and everyone was talking about which after party to head to (turns out zombies have a penchant for squat parties and dubstep) but while we finalised our plans, a big dirty zombie in a shiny blue tracksuit combo descended upon one of our party members. He had a flaky clown mask and a load of lanky hair dangling all over the shop, but while his figure was that of a depressed stay at home mum, he proceeded to eat our friends brains with exceptional flair and gusto, spitting some of them out and screaming "SCABBY BRAINS! YUCK, SCABBY BRAINS!"
He then grabbed our bottle of Strongbow, drawling "Strongbow, strong brains. Wrongbow, wrong brains!", explained that he was from the West country and scampered off. We later saw him crawling along the ground towards a couple of lady zombies screaming "Braiiins, braiiins, no, buuuuuuuuuuums!". He then started mawling one of the zombies bums but got hit in the face with a ladle by said zombie's girlfriend. She was not impressed.
While I'm sure pervy zombie's evening comprised of much of the same our final sighting of him was outside a pub where he put his mask on back to front, pulled his pants down and fell to the pavement on all fours. Because the road was on a slant he was unable to get back up and simply cried out for help with his pants around his ankles and his balls in all their alfresco glory.
Only in Bristol hey?


Le Phare- Yann Tiersen

So we were very excited about the release of Yann Tiersen's 6th studio album 'Dust Lane' and it's respective tour (various locations around Britain throughout November, tickets are only 17 pounds) but it was all just a little depressing for our liking. To be fair Tiersen's mother and a close friend died during the recording which must've put a bit of a dampener on things, so we've decided to go back to happier days with 'Le Phare' instead. Recorded in 1998 it was his breakthrough album which features many of his most famous tracks, including three pieces from the Amelie soundtrack, 'La Noyee', 'La Dispute' and 'Sur le Fil'. While the melancholy piano pieces and oh-so-french accordion which typify Tiersen's work are predominant, it really is a mixed bag of goodies. Violin pieces like 'L'arrivee sur L'Ile' will make you want to dance like a frantic gypsy, 'La Chute' shows the musician at his best as a pianist and a collaboration with singer Dominique A make for a couple of breaks from instrumentals with songs 'Monochrome' and 'Les bras de mer'. Sad but sweet with just the right amount of excitment, it's music for wandering around the park, kicking leaves and feeling chuffed about your new mittens.

Truce- Svetlana Proskurina

Saw this little gem at the BFF and as the first contemporary Russian film I'm glad to say that they haven't lost their tragic streak. The darkest humour I've ever come across, Truce tells the story of young truck driver Egor as he returns to his home town to find a wife. Set in a non-descript provincial town, Proskurina creates a witty and weirdly charming insight into life in Russia's no-man's land where the shocking is carelessly mixed in with the banal, blown off fingers and armed robberies set next to worn out buildings and bored husbands. The endless grasslands and barren houses are not so much depressing as a they are a reminder of how excessive our own society is and what the characters lack in tact or knowledge they more than make up for in charm and good humour. Wonderful performance by Ivan Bobranravov who, although comes across as something of a psycho in the opening scence turns out to be absolutely charming in a very Russian way, all sad eyes and beautiful smiles.

The Victoria & Albert Museum- Cromwell Rd, London SW7 2RL
You know you're broke when your official mantra is 'the best things in life are free', but the V&A's late sessions have nailed one for the destitute and proven that it's not all about love, friendship and sunshine. On the last Friday of every month this labyrinth of a museum sticks its finger to the idea that museums are for tourists and the retired by putting on an evening of music, exhibitions and activities, all for free. This month's 'Catching Shadows' features the temporary exhibition on camera-less photography, a jazz trio in the Grand Entrance, a ginormous playdoh landscape, thaumatrope workshop and a lovely old man in a black waistcoat taking people's silhouette portraits (see photo). Next month's event is running along some sort of Christmas theme but make sure you check the website to see what's on because the amount of different activities call for some prioritising.

Also...


Met the legendary illustrator in John Lewis the other day and while he missed the opportunity of being our featured person by not answering my question (what's your favourite book) he did sign our birthday card and let me take a picture of him. Thank you Quentin!

Week 21

Hey ducks!
So it's been a busy week as usual, and while I should be writing an essay about the significance of the Etats Generaux in the lead-up to the French revolution, I've found a lovely quote for you all:
"From an early age, Sieyes was fanatical about public happiness"- Francois Furet
Now I'm not suggesting that you start a revolution, distribute agitational pamphlets or harass the Queen (she's an old lady, just leave her alone) but wouldn't it be great if someone said that about your life?
"Timothy Watson was fanatical about public happiness"
"Anna Buckingham was fanatical abut public happiness"
"Average Joe was fanatical about public happiness."
I don't know, it just seems like a really nice thing to be remembered for.





And I've been getting urges late at night
To walk and walk for days and throughout lights
Through people's houses, picking food from plates
Through people's gardens, picking locks on gates

So we are moving to a lighthouse, you and I
While seas drown sailors, we'll be locked up safe and dry
And though our doors may knock and rattle in the wind
I'll just hold you tight and we'll not let those fuckers in

This here is my very first pop up card, it's about 30 by 40 cm and is pretty adequate despite being super fragile.Really, really wish I could make this picture bigger but maybe you can see that there's a little boy in a Pierrot hat and a girl with her hair in a bun sailing in the ship. I think they'll have a really nice time together.

This week we love...



This week I am extremely proud to announce that I had an interview with a real live artist. One that has a studio, and exhibitions and manages to sell all his work. Not only that but a man who took the time out to write back to not one but three of my emails and give me some very good advice to boot.This here is John Dilnot, illustrator, collector and god of small things.

What is your daily routine?
Routines are a great idea in theory but they don't last long with me as I'll get bored with it. I do like to start work early in the day and then I can relax knowing that I have achieved something, I think that is the nearest I get to a routine.

If you had to make a box to represent your life, what would it look like?
They all represent my life in some way, I'm sure that I would feel that any work that is more personal to me would represent my life in part but it would probably not be obvious to anyone else. I would like to see everything I've ever made put in the same room and see what that says.

Which of your pieces are you most proud of?
I hate to choose but I have just made a box called 'Bad Apples' that I am very proud of. The box contains rows of apples labelled with names that are largely forgotten old varieties, names such as Harvest Festival and Newton Wonder but each apple has been affected by rot, insects or a disease. It is a piece that I think has a lot of layers to discover and it also means a lot to me personally.

You seem to like collecting things, what is your most prized collection?
I had a very nice collection of milk cartons ( I collected them for the graphics) when I was a student, but despite washing them out they eventually got very smelly and I had to throw them away. I now have a collection of illustrated natural history books, many are often real labours of love and I find them inspiring.

What are you most inspired by: music, films or books?
I could be inspired by anything, inspiration comes when you are not looking for it. I listen to music or the radio when I'm working and sometimes a line from a song will jump out and hit me with an idea.

Your top 5 favourite artists?
Ed Ruscha, HC Westerman, Paul Nash, Max Ernst, Magritte.

What's your favourite font?
I wouldn't think in terms of favourites, I like all fonts and I would use anything that feels appropriate.

There is no way that I could adequately describe John's works so I suggest you check out his website where you can not only see his beautiful boxes and prints but can also buy some of his postcards (75p), little books (8.50) or kits to make your own accordion books (11.75). Magical.









The Cat Empire- Cinema

I remember seeing these guys play at Splendour in the Grass back in 2007 and being completely blown away by trumpeter Harry Angus (no pun intended). Three years on and officially Australia's 2nd biggest music export The Cat Empire have stayed true to their role as performers and created an album explicitly for the stage. Now I don't know about you but in a day and age where any tone deaf tween can become a 'musician' through digital remastering and implants, I find this very refreshing. Having played their 800th gig earlier this year the band is a genuine troupe of travelling musicians and the full bodied sound of Cinema reflects this experience. Th band's been dubbed as a fusion of jazz, ska, funk and rock with a heavy Latin influence but while in the past they've been happy to try their hand at whatever takes their fancy, theur 5th album emerges with a sound that is completely their own. "At times it's thoughtful, at times it just makes you forget and dance" says percussionist Felix Riebl. Reminds me of careless afternoons, burned shoulders and driving with the windows down. Favourite track is 'Call Me Home' but that could change as soon as the next one comes on.


All About my Mother- Pedro Almodovar

"Part of every woman is a mother/actress/saint/sinner. And part of every man is a woman." Take that tagline as literally as possible and you'll still be shocked by the content of Almodovar's dark but witty melodrama. Dealing with AIDS, transvestitism, faith and what it means to be a woman, the films begins fairly simply: On his 17th birthday, Manuela's son Esteban is run over by a car and killed. Distraught, she returns to her home town of Barcelona to find the father of her child whom she hasn't seen in over 17 years and happens to be a transvestite called Lola. Lola is impossible to find but by meeting up with her old friend Agrado (who is also a transvestite) Manuela becomes involved with Hermana Rosa, a pregnant nun with AIDS, acclaimed stage actress Huma Rojo and her heroine addict lover Nina. As you can imagine drama is often at fever pitch with this unlikely group of characters but while many of the issues dealt with make for a depressing experience the scripts wit and characters good humour create something really interesting. The acting is melodramatic but the emotions are sincere, the topics sordid but presented extremely stylishly and in nearly all the relationships you get this mix of mothering and sexual tension. Huge nod of approval to Penelope Cruz who plays Hermana Rose with the most wonderfully childish mannerisms. Absolutely charming. Favourite quote on the other hand has to be: "How could anyone act so macho with tits like that?" Just watch it.


Student protest, from outside ULU to Downing Street

So this Wednesday I joined the 3000-odd people demonstrating against George Osborne's Comprehensive Spending Review (CSR) outside Downing Street, and may I say, there's nothing quite like being in a big group and chanting about how pissed off you are. I'm pretty much the least politically aware person out but even I'd cottoned on to the fact that the government's looking to increase university fees to 10000 pounds a year, and I think that's plenty to be angry about, so I got hollering. Then there were loads of banners, and pamphlets being passed around and people asking you to sign petitions and shouting about the 'bastard bankers' and the 'cabinet's millionaire club' and we're all like 'shit, that's really awful..' Then came the talk about protecting our black brothers and following in the steps of our French cousins until we were all pretty much ready to rape and pillage Parliament. So we went to the pub. All in all an interesting experience, and one I'd recommend to anyone with a little bit of excess energy and a penchant for screaming. Plus you get the great feeling of solidarity and just a smidge of self righteousness at the end of it all. so why not? Oh and if you are into politics there really are about a million good causes to be fighting at the moment so you should probably get on it, the next big one I know of is the Anti Racism march on the 6th November. Click here for more information.

Also...

Percy pigs. Those disgustingly great sweets from M&S. Can't put a picture up because they're fairly hideous and you won't want to buy them, but their delicious.

Week 20

So it's Sunday morning, the sun's pouring in and we're enjoying a slice of marshmellow pie for breakfast and it has to be said, life is pretty fucking great.
Because if you can get out of bed in the morning and see just one interesting thing and have one person to call to let them know about your discovery then I'd say things are going well. We hope you have a million little moments this week, and in case you're not sure what the criteria for a 'moment' is, they include, but are certainly not limited to: fresh mozzarella on bread from the bakers, a kiss on the forehead, seeing pretty strangers, wearing most forms of knitwear and cracking monkey nuts out the window.
Go on, be happy just for a bit.

























Happy birthday Miranda panda.


This week we love...

A couple of weeks ago I met a sailor. Now I'd never met a sailor before and thought of them either as dapper young shmoozers with slicked back hair and chlamydia or burly old men with drinking problems, and while this one had a shaved head and a fir amount of tattoos, he'd also just finished reading 'War and Peace', so I thought I might be onto something. This is Ben, merchant sailor, engineer and fan of moules marinieres.



I imagine that I'm not the only person to find your job quite a novelty, why did you choose such an exotic career?
Over a girl (ha!) No, well I originally did a degree in IT but then a couple of years ago I met a bunch of people my age who'd just started their training for merchant sailing and it all sounded so exciting and my girlfriend at the time was being...well a woman (no offence taken there, we all know exactly what he means) so I told myself I'f giver her a week to sort herself out and if she didn't then I'd join the navy. And she didn't, so I did, and here I am.

Can you give us an outline of your day to day routine?
Well I wake up at 3.30am, grab some food then head to the engine room for 4 am and work there until 8am. Then there's breakfast and back to work from 8.30 til 12. After that I've got 4 hours 'free' time during which I have lunch (usually some sort of curry dish because most of the ship's officers are Indian) and then back to my cabin to read or write or more likely than not, sleep.

Would you say it's quite a solitary life?
Yeah definitely, I mean there's this unwritten rule that you do not disturb people while they're on their break. They're in their cabin and what they do in there is their own business, it's the only time that you get any sense of privacy. Because you're all stuck on a ship together it becomes really quite important. I think I'm quite a solitary person anyway so the lifestyle suits me but there are times where I miss England, because most of the crew are either Indian or Philipino and while they speak English you can only ever get to a certain level of conversation. You just don't get the same sort of banter as you do at home.

So you sail from Singapore to Cameron through Malaysia, Thailand, China, Korea, South Africa, Nigeria, Togo, Ghana and back again, have you seen any mind blowing sights?
Of course. This one time we were sailing into Cape Town and we could see about 5 whales and all these seals and dolphins having a party. No seriously, it was like this massive aquatic mash up with all of them jumping out of the water together and looking like they were either playing together or having a massive orgy. It was amazing.

That sounds incredible..
Yeah, you get moments like that, or like when our captain organised a basketball court on the deck and you're sailing along the West coast of Africa playing basketball and drinking beer, and everything's great. Then you get moments like when we were caught in a storm for 4 days and the ship was constantly at a 20 degree angle and everything's sliding out of place and you have to hold onto your plate at dinner. Or when you're down in the engine room and it's 46 degrees and you're sweating away in your hard hat and overalls and there's just no way of refreshing yourself because by the time you climb upstairs to get a drink and back down again, you've sweated it all away again.

What about safety-wise, I mean have you come into any scrapes?
Well merchant sailing is actually the second most dangerous job (first being deep sea fishing), because of storms and what not but also because of pirates. Harbour pirates are pretty common. Essentially they target boats that are waiting to come into the docks, sneak up on them in tiny speed boats and steal whatever they can. I was on pirate watch for a few nights along the West coast of Africa and spotted 3 or 4 attempts but you just need to signal the person upstairs and they shine a massive light on the them an they duck down and scamper off. You have to be really careful though, I have a friend who got half his hand cut off by a pirate with a machete. And that's just harbour pirates, if you get attacked out at sea you're pretty much fucked. they climb on with guns and stuff, steal the ship and take the crew as hostages, so yeah, dangerous stuff.

Well if you see the year out, what are your plans for the future?
I've got a year left of training and after that I'll be a fully qualified engineer and can start applying to work on whatever ships I want. I'd really like to work on either of the ships that are part of the British Antarctic Survey. You get to sail around Antarctica transporting equipment and supplies and scientists so I think that'd be pretty interesting.

I think it's fair to say he's put everyone's 9 til 5 jobs to shame, so next time you're queuing up for the photocopy machine or filling in a spreadsheet you can remember: adventure is out there.

Wonder-Lisa Mitchell

Pretty much the only worthwhile person to have come out of a talent show since Olivia Newton-John (back off, Sandy's great!) Lisa Mitchell is just lovely. At just 19 she's compiled an album of 'candy coated folk pop' with just a little bit of something bitter in the middle. Everyone loves a little bit of xylophone (Neopolitan Dreams) and then there's your fill of synthesiser in 'Coin Laundry' which ranked 7th in Triple J's top 100 of 2009. After that you've got your standard 'sad but beautiful, I'm sad this didn't work out' love song in 'Love Letter' and a bit of a pick me up from 'Clean White Love'. Nothing to complain about really although I think it's fair to call it chick music. Think Laura Marling, Regina Spektor and Feist put in a blender and served in a milkshake glass.


Circo- Aaron Schock

For 100 years the Ponce family have been touring Mexico with their travelling circus 'Circo Mexico'. Tino is ringmaster, his daughter contortionist, his 3 sons acrobats, trapezists and lion tamer and his brother rides a bike in the 'incredible sphere of death'. Over a period of 21 months film maker Aaron Schock follows the family in their fairytale lifestyle and while certain moments are extremely comical, he also reveals the economic hardships of rural Mexico, the fading of long standing traditions and the parallel dissolution of a family. Visually stunning and incredibly put together, Circo introduces us to an unbelievable cast if characters who not only constantly offer little nuggets of wisdom but really remind us of what's best in people. Favourite character has to be Tino's tiny niece. She's so sweet she'll make you smile until your cheeks hurt.

You know when you're vaguely interested in something, and all of a sudden you just seem to see it everywhere. This week it's been stuffed animals. They are fucking everywhere. So if you're into dead things with glass eyes or, more likely, would like to avoid them like the plague, here are a few places to note:

Get Stuffed- 105 Essex Road N1 2SL

It all started here because I wanted to talk to the owner and find out about his clientele and what not because, let's face it, having a shop full of stuffed animals in the middle of Angel seems like a strange business move. Turns out the staff are complete wankers and won't even let you into the shop without an appointment but lucky for us you can see everything through the windows. It's a weird melange of household pets and exotic beasts including some puppies, a swan, an ostrich, a massive turtle, some monkeys, a couple of wolves and a whack load of crows. Worth a peak if your in the area just because there's something so sinister and out of place about it.


Viktor Wynd's Little Shop of Horrors- 11 Mare Street E8 4RP

After the disappointment that was Get Stuffed we walked along Regents Canal to this strange little gem. Part shop, part curiosity cabinet it's a tiny haven packed with the weird and wonderful from pickled aliens to 'the cunt colouring in book' to a load of magazine clippings about Garry Glitter. There are obviously quite a few stuffed animals although a lot of them look a little worse for wear and are by no means the most impressive things in the shop. Ended up buying some butterflies and an old bottle of gin (we're extremely practical people) and will be sure to drop by again for one of the events they host. See website here.


The Museum of Everything- Sharples Hall St, Camden Town, NW8

Am a little bit in love with the Museum of Everthing. It's their third exhibition and this time has been drawn from Peter Blake's bizarre collection of objects and artefacts so when you walk into the building (which reminds me of those 'Fun Houses' you get at the fair) you'll see Tom Thumb's shoes, a lot of pictures of show-midgets, clown costumes, old arcade games (there's one where you shoot tin cats off roofs), an electronic automatic palm reader, carousel horses, enormous circus banners and some very strange taxidermy. The animals originally came from Walter Potter's Museum of Curiosity but Blake bought a considerable amount of the exhibits and so we are treated to a very strange sight: stuffed animals in clothes and assembled in little scenarios, like two squirrels bare fist boxing in a ring or kittens at school or my personal favourite: toads having an aerobics class. The caption next to the montage reads: "Athletic Toads" Common English toads- 18 of them- enjoying a sunny afternoon in the park with swings and see saws (mechanically driven). Fucking great.

Also...



Cath Kidston cowboy flannel. Thank you Ginny.

Week 19

Hey sweet peas!
So it's Sunday afternoon and I'm trying to drink my Earl Grey with the spoon still in the cup, and generally feeling pretty dazed but specifically feeling like I miss Ginny. Because she's posted in Cambridge now and I'm still in London and while I talk to her everyday, and call her so she can help me choose my shopping at Sainsbury's, it's not the same as having her here. And I'm not writing this in a 'woe is me, poor preppy white girl' kind of way, it's just the gypsy life gets a little bit tiering sometimes, and if you have even just one person who you get to hang out with all the time, and who has known you for more than 12 months then, well, you're really lucky. Because you can show up to their house uninvited, and make potato waffles together and just sit and talk shit or just do your own thing but know that they're there, and they love you. So if you have someone like that in your life, now is probably the time to turn around and look at them in their cruppled tshirt and yesterdays socks and give them a mad hug. Like properly bear-jump them.
Hope you guys have fun together.




Really hope it's not racist to think that Mexicans have an alarming resemblance to peanuts. Because they do. Here is my super prototype for a new generation of kids toys, 'You're very own Several Amigos' set. All peanut characters are detachable and come with a hat and concise personality profile. Squint your eyes if you want to read.

This week we love...




Every once in a while you meet someone that just seems to come from nowhere. You know the ones that you can't imagine them having parents, or a bank account, and would put money on them not actually having a belly button. This week's featured person is one of those. Allow me to introduce you to Kpete Noeden Howden Brunton-Crunk, 23 year old med student, gambler and substance explorer.
Now if this was a Charles Dickens novel, and people's names served as an indicator of their character, Kpete's pretty much sets the pace for his life. Someone bet him that he wouldn't put a silent 'k' infront of his name so he not only proved him wrong but one-upped him by having a renaming party and registering himself as this new double-barreled monstrosity. Kpete Noeden Howden Brunton-Crunk. Amazing.
As you've probably guessed by now, Kpete has a penchant for drugs. While we're chatting he's whipped out abotu 10 enormous poppy pods, stuck them in a blender and made tea with the powder. Smells like the skin of a jacket potato but he seems pretty happy with it.
He hands me a 5 page letter from his solicitor giving the details of his arrest and subsequent caution for posession of class A drugs. Here's an excerpt:

In respect to the LSD, you said that it was your intention to recreate the LSD experiments conducted by the CIA in the 60s.
You indicated that all the drugs found on your person were for personal consumption and that the self seal bags and scales were consistent with that usage.
you gave details of the casinos in which you were gambling and you gave details of your "winning methods".
[...]
You were interviewed by the police and accepted my advicec to answer questions, you set out your case fully and frankly. You told the officers that you are a heavy user of drugs on occasions you are not studying for higher level qualifications.

He seems pretty unphased about it all and has decided to take a gap year, make some money in casinos with his autistic friend (I'm not even kidding) and go travelling around South-East Asia.
As for long term plans he's got it all figured out. First up will be his charity 'The Dangers of Running with your Hands in your Pockets' aimed at spreading awareness of this extremely dangerous habit (think tshirts, website and a yearly marathon to really make his point) then make millions, buy a fucking massive yacht and write a book.
It's time to go to bed so we part ways with an invite to take shrooms in Kew Gardens and one last funny story about the time he set his hair on fire in the bath.
I hope he lives to 100.




The Suburbs- Arcade Fire

Being a total cheat here and putting this here even though I haven't listened to the whole album. Just feel like sending out a bit of general Arcade Fire appreciation, rather than anything specific to this album, because 'The Suburbs' and 'City with no Children' are good, but so's 'Wake Up' and 'Intervention'. Also loving the film clip for 'My body is a Cage'. Wish I was a cowboy.


The Cranes Are Flying- Mikhail Kalatozov

Recommended by my Grandpapie, 'The Cranes Are FLying' seems to me like a Soviet-era version of 'A Very Long Engagement'. Released in 1957 it's a beautiful black and white film about WW2, or as Russians refer to it, 'The Great Patriotic War', and the effect it had on the Russian psyche. More specifically though it's about Boris and Veronika, two sweethearts who are separated when Boris volunteers himself into the army, and the torment Veronika puts herself through as she waits for him to come home. In true Russian style it's all rather tragic and you're left with very little comfort at the end but some shots are just perfect (favourite being the cuckoo clock hanging in the bombed down living room). Plus Tatyana Sanojlova is an absolute babe.


John Dilnot, Natural History at Rebecca Hossack Gallery, 28 Charlotte Street, Fitzrovia London W1T 2NA

Feeling a sense of urgency about writing this because the exhibition ends either today or tomorrow, but if by any chance you're in central London this very minute RUN to Charlotte Street and check it out. It is the prettiest darn exhibition I've ever seen. The Rebecca Hossack Gallery is a lovely little space, two rooms of wood floors and white walls and currently home to 30 or so pieces by John Dilnot. The collection's called 'Natural History' and is best summed up as: maps, mothboxes, paper birds, bad apples, miniature forests and melancholy. go.right. now.
Or look it up on Google Images, either way.


Also...

Saw this a few days ago in my first ever film studies class. It's just so romantic, especially if you see it in big.

Week 18

Hello pollo locco!
Well as some of you may know the last 7 days have been what's known as freshers week, or to elaborate 'teeny boppers are finally released from controlling middle-class parents clutches, go ape shit and get their stomach pumped'. fucking mental. But it hasn't been all bad, there have been many interesting encounters and more than a few random moments, the whole experience best summarized in this little snippet: St George, Mother Theresa and Heidi treck through the rain following a fat middle-eastern Father Christmas who is leading them all to a Norwegian sailor's hospital to get totally shit faced.
Not much else to say really.







We can take absolutely no credit for this little wonder as it was Yolanda who came up with the message. It sounded so much more charming in her brocken English but when you read it to yourselves imagine a little Spanish lady with big hair saying it to you. Frightening.

This week we love...



So I was hoping to interview the night porter of my building, Tony, to find out what horrors he'd witnessed over freshers week (I know one guy was puking his guts out and ended up throwing up blood), but night porters are strangely hard to get hold of. Instead here is a fairly interesting conversation I had earlier this week. It's definitely not an interview, but my 5 minutes spent with him make me sure he deserves to be our featured person. Here goes:
*After many many drinks in the Ice Wharf in Camden (ok, not a cool spot but we had coupons!), Will and I were getting hounded out of the bar by this enormous black guy, who I believe was the bouncer*
Bouncer: Come on guys, get out of here, I've got a lady waiting for me at home and I believe she's put on something very very special..(chuckles to himself)

* Will gets up to use the loo, I follow to tell him I'll meet him outside*

B: Hey, hey! Stop right there! I know exactly where you're going!
E: What?
B: You're going to have illicit sex with that man in the gents, come on, get out of here!
E: EXCUSE ME?
B: Yeah I know who you are, you skank, you whore, come on, move along (chuckling still)
E: Says the guy who's got his hussy waiting for him at home.
B: Not a hussy, a husky.
E: What?
B: Yeah, I'm a beastophiliac.
E: Fair play. I like your gold tooth, where did you get it?
B: It was as a rite of passage, for the first dog I fucked.
E: Wicked, what kind was it?
B: A Great Dane. So I could cuddle in its fur afterwards.
* Will stumbles in*
B: Thank God you're here, get this crazy bitch out of here, she's totally sick.
W: ?
E: Go home and fuck a jack russel. Loser.

And that was that. Told a massive black bouncer to sleep with a hound. Amazing what 4 glasses of wine will do to you.



The Bombay Bicycle Club- I Had the Blues but I Shook Them Off

I wasn't really sure what to say about these guys but inspiration has come. I'm sitting at my desk right now and looking out the window and who should I see but 'across the road man' slouching on his balcony and smoking a cigarette. He looks like shit. All pale and frowning and middle aged even though he's probably in his late 20s. And I think this album is for him. Because it's not life changing and there's nothing exceptional about it but it's just catchy. And unabashedly adolescent. All rejected love and misplaced anger , it's the perfect soundtrack to riding your bike around in the wind and still kidding yourself that everything you do is important. A lot of the songs seem to blend together to me but some like 'Evening/Morning' and 'Always Like This' are especially catchy. You've also got to love them for how many instruments they clain to play, eg: Jack Steadman- lead vocals, guitar, xylophone, banjo and triangle. Bless.


Dr Zhivago- David Lean

So I found out I have to spend a month in Kasan (7 hours train ride inland from Moscow) and thought I'd psyche myself up about camping out in Russian wasteland by watching Pasternak's classic love story. Spanning approximately 40 years and set in Bolshevik Russia, Dr Zhivago tells the story of a doctor/poet and his undying but never truly fulfilled love for the beautiful Lara. The film was made back in 1965 and although it won 5 Oscars it was deemed a failure by critics and is now seen as a popular classic, which I think is a fair judgement. The acting is super corny and Julie Christie's bouffant hardly seems fitting for a woman who ends up dying in a forced labour camp, but it is a bit of fun, plus the shots of the Urals and massive plains really are impressive. Favourites include the little red Balalaika, the snow palace and Omar Sharif's childlike mannerisms. Oh and the way he always looks like he's about to cry. The guy's just moved by everything!


Anish Kapoor, Turning the World Upside Down- Kensington Gardens, London W2 3XA

Enjoying a short respite from the rain I rode my bike around Hyde Park (as you do when you've got too much spare time and anti-social tendenciess). I was just across the pond from Kensington Palace when I turned around and what should I see but an enormous disc placed at the other end of the park. It looked like the moon had fallen into the gardens or maybe even the Little Prince's planet, but as it happens it's just one of Anish Kapoor's new sculptures. I say 'just' but these things are really fucking impressive. It's a series of 4 mirror sculptures that have been set up around Kensington Gardens until March 2011 so you can wander around the park and see yourself reflected upside down with all the trees hanging down from the sky, or admire the patch of clouds floating behind your head. I'm not a massive fan of modern sculpture but I think this really is very interesting. It just looks so surreal to see these enormous bits of metal planted among the chestnut trees, plus if you go in the next few days you can also enjoy a coffee or a game of ping pong in Jean Nouvel's pavillion outside the Serpentine Gallery. Lush.

Also...




Bought these bad boys from the 99p store on Camden High Street. Clearly excellent.